Categories
Marriage

Lessons I’ve Learned In Marriage

On March 2nd, my husband and I celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary! I’m so thankful for my wonderful husband and God’s faithfulness throughout our marriage. To find someone to love and loves you back is truly an amazing thing — especially when he chooses to love you even at your worst.

As in all marriages, there are highs and lows. I wouldn’t change a single second of it for I have grown as a person and in my faith through our relationship. However, I wanted to share with you two lessons that I have learned in my marriage:

1. He shouldn’t be my everything. Walter is my best friend, my confidant, and I love just being in the same room as him. It’s romantic to say that “he’s my everything” (which in many ways he is), however, I don’t expect him to be my everything. It’s an unfair pressure to put on him. My husband needs to be able to hang with his friends and talk with them without constantly worrying about me. And I need to have people that I can be with as well. When our shelter-in-place happened last March, I was totally content — I’m an introvert and I got to spend my time with the people most important to me. I would be completely happy only hanging out with my husband every single day, but that doesn’t mean that’s all I should do. God designed us to have relationships with others and even though I struggle with idea of female relationships, I’m learning that there is a place for them and that I need them in my life as well.

2. He doesn’t define my worth. My husband and I are two imperfect sinners that are able to love each other and live together by the grace of God. My husband gets to see both the best and worst of me…and sometimes we are quicker to point out where the other one is lacking and forget to point out the good things. My worth isn’t defined by my husband or any one else. My worth is defined by God. When I remember that, I find myself less defensive to criticism and open to improvement…knowing that he loves me still.

I thank God every day for giving me Walter and I pray that the Lord would continue to work in my heart and teach me how I can love my husband more each and every day.

Categories
Family Goals Health and Wellness Marriage Parenting

What’s Your Word of the Year?

Since the beginning of 2021, I’ve been hearing a lot about having a “Word of the Year.” People have been choosing a “Word of the Year” prior to now, but I wonder if I’m seeing it more this year because people are afraid to have goals and dreams in 2021 after the letdown of 2020. 

It’s crazy to think that there is one word in all of language that will envelope my hopes for 2021 (check out this funny video from The Holderness Family: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uNZeZK7-4uU), but I think I came up with one. I still created my list of dreams for 2021, but tried to funnel it all into one word.

My word of the year is CARE. 

I picked this word because of the different ways it can be used.

“Take care…”

“Handle with care…”

“I care about you…”

I want to be more empathetic and show people that I care about their hurts/struggles. 

I want to make sure those closest to me know that I love them and make it a priority to tell them every single day that I care about them and that they matter. 

I want to grow how I take care of my aging parents and my family. I want to heal relationships by caring enough to listen and learn. 

At my job, I want my students to always know that they are valued and loved

In my business, I want my clients to know that I genuinely want to see them grow and succeed — that I care about their health and success. 

When the world gets crazy and out of control, I want to care about it more and not just compartmentalize. 

I want to care enough to be honest with people when I’ve been hurt instead of walking away.

As with any goals and dreams, I’m not going to beat myself up when I fail. My hope is that this word will resonate through my mind as I look at my daily to-do list, waver on returning a text, or find myself holding onto my hurt and anger…and that I will make a decision to show that I care.

How about you? Do you have a word that resonates with you and your dreams?

Categories
Faith Health and Wellness Marriage

So Much To Be Thankful For

2020 has been quite a year and now we’ve reached Thanksgiving. Pretty sure we thought life would be back to normal, but as I write this things all around me in my state are shutting down again because of the COVID. As mentioned in my previous blog post, there is always a way to find gratitude through the hard. In fact, gratitude is good for your health and helps with stress levels, etc.! So, I’m choosing to find gratitude in everything. Here’s what I’m grateful for this year:

-When everything shut down in March, we got so much more time with our family…and realized how busy we had become with all of our sporting events. The time allowed us to re-evaluate what we wanted to do as a family.

-I got a new job as the P.E. teacher at Covenant Classical School! The interview process started right before the shelter-at-home began, so we had to get creative with interviews and I was finally hired in June. The job allows me to teach at my kids school and only work during their hours. In October, I left my coaching position at Orangetheory Fitness so that I could continue to be here for my family and stay focused on my new job. It has saved my sanity!

-I’m thankful for our school — the amazing education my kids are getting, the awesome friends and faculty, and that we are IN school full-time!

-My son broke his elbow the beginning of July and needed to have surgery to put three pins in it. That’s not the positive. 😉 Honestly, there was a lot of it that sucked and we called it his “bummer summer”. He missed out on A LOT of stuff. However, so many people were dealing with disappointments in 2020, so he wasn’t alone and the only one doing life differently. My son and I still talk about the sweetness of hanging out in my room and watching movies while he recovered. And again, we were forced to slow down.

-I’m thankful for my son’s baseball team and the amazing boys on the team. They have all become the best of friends and are incredibly encouraging and supportive of each other. Their support when Edmund broke his elbow was HUGE.

-Today, as I celebrate my son’s 11th birthday and the day I became a mother, I am INCREDIBLY grateful for the gift of my children. Every day with them is a blessing and I’m humbled and thankful that God chose me to be their mom.

-I’m thankful for the gift of my marriage that continues to grow stronger day by day. Again, the pandemic has allowed us to have more time to spend together and not rush around…although we have had to learn to be more intentional with our time. 😉 I’m thankful that I’m totally content just hanging around with my husband all day and talking with him. He makes me laugh and smile and is my safe space. 

Every time I look back on my life, I can see the obvious ways that God has been working and continues to work in my life. He has used every situation and event to mold me and prepare me for the future. I’m overwhelmingly thankful for his guidance, provision, sacrifice, and love for me — for sending Jesus to die on the cross and take the penalty of sin for me; for the assurance of salvation and an eternity in heaven; that nothing is out of his control; and that, even though I am sinful and fail, I am loved.

What are you thankful for?